Are you a mum? Are you winging it through motherhood. Do you ever ask yourself, “what on earth am I doing?” Do you ever feel out of your depth, unsure of yourself, or suffer from the dreaded ‘mum guilt’? Are you desperate to hear those beautiful words, ‘don’t worry, it gets easier’?
If you answered ‘yes’ to any of these questions, then I’ve got some great news for you. First of all, you’re not alone. And secondly, I’m here for you. I’m a mum who’s winging it. Just like you.
Who am I?
Hey, I’m Hannah. A thirty-something mum from Kent, England. I have been married to Alex for 8 and a half years, and we have two beautiful girls, Zoe, who’s just turned 3, and Sophia, who is 9 months old and counting. Winging it through motherhood is my mantra.
Becoming a mummy was without a doubt, one of the best things that has ever happened to me. At the same time, I’m also increasingly realising that a) motherhood is hard work (biggest understatement ever!!!), and b) I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing, hence the ‘winging it’ part.
If you’re still wondering what this blog is all about and what you can expect to find here, (and if you should bother to read anymore), let me enlighten you. You’ve probably already realised, this is first and foremost a blog about being a mum. Motherhood, faith and family are central aspects of this blog, as these things are very important to me, and are completely inter-related in my journey as a mum. And as for what you can expect to find? Honesty. By the bucket load. I’m winging it through motherhood and learning lots along the way.
Is being a mum as easy job? Nooooo. Is it worthwhile? Absolutely
Winging it through motherhood
Sharing is caring
I’m here to share my journey with you. To be honest about the struggles I have faced and continue to face as I navigate motherhood. But don’t worry, it’s not all struggles and late night pondering of ‘am I really cut out for this?’ There have been, and will continue to be, plenty of sweet and flipping hilarious moments along the way.
I live with a toddler, having a sense of humour is mandatory.
Here to help
I’m here to help you. To help you find new ways of doing things to make life just that little bit easier. I may be winging it through motherhood, but I also have lots of tips to share with you that I’ve found useful, or even life changing, along the way.
Comrades in the trenches
I’m offering you the friendship of someone who knows exactly how you feel when you’re finding life tough, and doesn’t judge! We’re on this motherhood journey together, so I hope we can be friends and wing it together.
Let’s find joy
Finally, I’m here to help you remember the joy of motherhood, to celebrate the beautiful moments with you, and to strive to find these moments every day. And to do all this amongst the busyness, the sleeplessness, the frustrations and (let’s be honest) the tears of motherhood. Let’s chase joy. It’s not always easy, but it’s worth it.
Can you keep a secret?
Now that you know a little bit about me, and what you can expect to find here at Mum About The Home, I want to let you into a little secret right from the outset. I am not a ‘have it all together’ kind of mum. There are definitely mothers out there who qualify for this highly esteemed title, and I salute these superhero’s, I mean mums. You both dazzle, and inspire me. But superhero, I am not. I am very, VERY human.
Some mums simply take it all in their stride and seem completely unflappable. But not me! I love to flap. Lots of flapping. I’m basically a bird!
Winging it through motherhood
In fact, I think I am the antithesis of an unflappable mum. The expression ‘winging it’ sums up my experience of motherhood most succinctly. And I am ok with that.
Being a mum is not easy. Some days, I feel like a complete failure. Other days, even though I now have two children, and should know what I’m doing, I still feel completely clueless. And then of course, there are the times when the sound of my voice drives me crazy – so much nagging. Urgh.
But there are also days when I amaze myself by how calm, organised, creative and generally Mary Poppins like I can be. Unfortunately, these days do not come round as often as I would have liked.
But I’m definitely learning. And with each failure I am brought closer to a more peaceful, pain-free, joy-filled way of doing life with two littlies.
Learning on the job
Whilst winging it through motherhood, I’m constantly finding new and better ways of doing things that help me stay sane and keep my head above the water.
- getting my baby to nap for more than 25 minutes a day
- being productive and actually getting things done as a stay at home mum
- helping my toddler overcome her fear of pooing on the toilet
- breastfeeding a baby whilst there’s a toddler on the loose
The list goes on. It’s a constant process of learning and improving, so life is certainly never dull.
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Although it turns out that being a mum isn’t quite the fairy tale I had been anticipating, neither did I expect how much joy it would bring me. Sandwiched between the challenges and the mundane, I continually find beautiful, heart changing moments. These moments often sneak up on me out of the blue. So simple, yet often profound. They are electric and yet they are so so real.
Counting my blessings
A few weeks ago, I was putting together a bookshelf for Zoe’s room. When it was finished and we both sat back to admire my handiwork (it wasn’t that amazing, but she’s easily impressed), she turned to me, smiled and said:
‘Mummy, thank you for making my bookshelf. I really like it.’
When did she become so sweet?
Or the first time, she wanted to pray for her daddy who was “working hard to look after the family.” Her words, not mine.
Such a beautiful moment.
And of course, how can I forget all those times she tells me, “I love you, mummy.”.
Seriously, could my heart be any more full?
And what about Sophia? She has a smile reserved just for me. If you’re a mum, you know exactly the one I mean.
All these moments are pure gold. They are treasure amongst the trials of motherhood.
Engraved in my heart
These precious moments are leaving their marks deep in my heart. One smile, one word, one cuddle at a time. I want to hit the ‘pause’ button and just soak them in. I want to savour each and every one of them. And then I want to hug my girls a little tighter, read them that extra story at bedtime, and generally be more extravagant in loving them.
Because just like that, these moments will pass.
Whilst being a mum might be a lot harder than I had anticipated, the sheer beauty of it all similarly transcends the heights I could have ever thought possible.
So whilst, I may not be a ‘have it all together’ kind of mum, I am learning to see the beauty in the bedlam. And I will continue to wing it, finding wisdom along the way.
Enjoying the journey
I am absolutely determined to enjoy the journey, and not just look ahead to the destination. Whether that be a baby who sleeps through the night, or a toddler whose favourite words are no longer ‘no’ or ‘why?’ Each season is precious in its own right. Simply because I will never get to live these moments again.
Let’s look for treasure in the tiredness, find joy for the journey and enjoy beauty in the bedlam.
I started my blogging journey by confessing to not being a ‘have it all together’ kind of mum. If you stick with me, you will see for yourselves just how true this confession is. But equally I hope you can learn from some of my mistakes and be inspired to live a fuller, happier life.
I do not want to put on a motherhood masquerade. Motherhood is beautiful, no doubt about it and I sincerely hope this shines through as you follow my journey. But it is also messy. And all those hard, frustrating, sometimes ugly bits, that make me want to scream into a pillow, or worse, I think they are simply showing me how much of a work in progress I am. I do not want to hide those uglier bits from you either, because if we’re going to be friends, and I hope we are, we have to be honest with each other.
I am going to work on them, by the grace of God, one day at a time. Because my girls are worth it. And because the process of motherhood is refining me, and making me more beautiful.
To quote from Ruth Schwenk, author and blogger at The Better Mom:
Just as God is using us as moms to shape our children, God is using our children and motherhood to shape us.
Let’s be refined together on the journey. As we wing our way through motherhood, let’s remember that this is a high calling and a privilege. Even when it’s hard work. Let’s count our blessings, pursue joy and hold onto the treasures we discover along the way.
Today might have been a disaster, but tomorrow is an unwritten page.
And I am full of hope that it will be a good one.
Who’s with me?